Effective parenthood How to say no

Saying no to kids may not come easily to parents. Children are delicate beings who might very well misconstrue the “no” as something else. However there are ways to do it.

Why is important to say no sometimes?

It is because the more a parent says yes to everything, the child starts taking them for granted. Yes, they are children and they don’t understand that much. But taking granted comes easily to all types of humans, whether kids or adults. They might also perceive such a parent as “weak”. It is very important for children to have firm, but polite role models. They will go on to do the same thing to their children.

Don’t get angry

The trick is to never get angry. It gets very messy if the parent becomes angry and starts screaming. Screaming at children has very different results from what parents think. It shuts them down. Sometimes they might find a way to obtain what they want by other means.(By not telling the parents off course). The idea is to keep calm and cool when dealing with children.

Focus on the yeahs instead of the nays

Instead of saying “no”, parents should try diverting the attention of the child somewhere else. For example, they can tell the child what he or she can do. For example, suppose a child wants to blow bubbles in the house. Instead of saying no, the parents can ask the child to do the same outside or inside the garage. Similarly, children who want something which isn’t good for them can be also redirected towards

something else. This trick works well because the children think that they are being given lots of options.

Always be polite

Polite behavior isn’t a sign of weakness. It is a sign of self confidence and self assurance. A polite parent is a great role model for a child. However, being polite doesn’t mean that the parent cannot have opinions. Communicating the opinions effectively to the child is what politeness is all about. It needs to be done in a way which doesn’t involve screaming or shouting. It is very easy to lose temper. It is very difficult to keep calm instead.

Girls are different from boys

Even at this age, parents need to understand that girls are indeed different. They are still taught that adjusting or not voicing their concerns will take them ahead in life. Boys are taught that they need to be “brave” and “outspoken”. The end result of this is that girls feel the pressure to be “polite” at all times, whereas boys don’t much care about it at all.

Girls need to be told by their parents that voicing their opinions or being self-assertive isn’t a sign of rudeness. They also often need clear communication from their parents asking them to open up. For example, they often need to be told that it is okay to accept compliments.

Why say no?

To be able to say no to children gives parents strength. This strength makes them better parents. Saying no is a true sign of good

parenthood. Why is it so? It is because it involves many considerations. A parent has to think about how the child is going to feel about it. They also have to think about whether their children’s behavior will change afterwards. In spite of all these considerations, if a parent is able to say no to their children, then it automatically takes the relationship forward. The child also learns to respect their parents. They also learn that sometimes they will have to hear no from their parents. And that is very important.

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